Signs of Religious Trauma & What You Can Do

This blog is authored by Jenn Geiman, PhD, a member of the IntraSpectrum Counseling clinical team.

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While a relatively new designation, religious trauma has impacted many peoples pervasively throughout time. It has been defined by the Religious Trauma Institute as: “the physical, emotional, or psychological response to religious beliefs, practices, or structures that is experienced by an individual as overwhelming or disruptive and has lasting adverse effects on a person’s physical, mental, social, emotional, or spiritual well-being.” More plainly, it is the impact of being harmed by religion, religious people, or larger religious structures in such a way that the pain and harm lingers even years or decades later.

It is vital to note that religious trauma can stem from any form of religion, and particularly those that impose strict structure on behavior and identity. Often these restrictions on behavior and identity are especially impactful for those who hold marginalized identities, as they are less likely to hold power in religious spaces. Examples include, but are certainly not limited to:

• women and people assigned female at birth (control related to gender roles, labor, bodily autonomy)
• queer people (control related to relational and sexual behavior, gender presentation), and
• both older individuals and children (less autonomy related to where they go, what services they are exposed to, exposure to religiously mandated diet restriction and physical punishment/abuse)

Common signs that you may have experienced religious trauma:

• Low self-worth due to messaging that humans are inherently sinful
• Experiences of having physical boundaries pushed and/or struggles maintaining awareness of the physical boundaries of others
• All or nothing thinking – everything is either good or bad, very little grey area
• Sexual knowledge that is either much more or much less in-depth than is age-appropriate
• Questioning religious beliefs leads to feelings of intense distress or desire to die
• Tendency toward intense loyalty to people or groups, even if you are hurt by them
• Repression of emotion or intense emotionality in inappropriate environments
• Lack of knowledge of pop-culture, leading to feeling separated from peers or society
• Strong sense of self-doubt, lack of trust in your own decision-making
• Spiritual bypassing, such that problematic behaviors or environments are explained away using religious doctrine
• Resistance to questioning authority that has been accepted as just
• Disgust regarding your own sexuality and/or gender identity, struggles to experience pleasure, disconnection from body or crying during/after sexual experiences
• Trauma related to conversion therapy
• Lack of self-compassion
• Lack of sense of purpose or meaning in absence of religion

To be clear, this is not a diagnostic list – a blog post never outweighs your knowledge of yourself. That said, if this post struck a chord with you, you may consider reflecting on these issues. You may choose solitary reflection, sharing with friends and/or family, or processing your experiences with a therapist.

What could a therapist do, you might ask?
A skilled and trained affirming therapist can:

• Assist you with processing deconstruction of religious beliefs
• Process with you how your identities intersected with your experiences of religion
• Address how religious trauma interacts with family system and larger systems
• Help you focus on self-compassion
• Process with you how you attachment style developed in the context of having an attachment bond to a higher power

If you do elect to work with a therapist on issues related to religious trauma:

• Trust your gut
• You are allowed to ask if a therapist has experience and knowledge associated with religious trauma broadly, or with your specific background
• If you meet with them and feel uncomfortable sharing, I would encourage you to share that with them
• If they respond poorly to your feedback, you are always allowed to change therapists

Ultimately, if control has been something that has caused you pain, it is vital you feel like you have agency to make the right decisions for you.

Additional reading:
Leaving the Fold: A Guide for Former Fundamentalists and Others Leaving Their Religion, Darren M. Slade, Adrianna Smell, Elizabeth Wilson, and Rebekah Drumsta

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This blog is authored by Jenn Geiman, PhD, a member of the IntraSpectrum Counseling clinical team. IntraSpectrum Counseling is Chicago’s leading psychotherapy practice dedicated to the LGBTQ+ community, and we strive to provide the highest quality mental health care for multicultural, identity, kink, polyamorous, and intersectional issues. For anyone needing affirming and validating support, please click here or contact us at help@intraspectrum-chicago.com.